"Wild beasts, and the angels"-Sermon for Lent 1, Mark 1:9-15
So, as I know many of you recall, we used to begin each service, each Sunday with a short video. It was intended as a way to draw us into and center us for worship. Sometimes it was a reflection by a well-regarded church leader or theologian and sometimes a collection of words, images and music…and in both cases we sought to root the video in the themes of that particular Sunday or the church season we were living in. And, as an aside, at St. Julian’s, this might have been particularly helpful, as we are a social and, at times, boisterous lot, which I have always loved and encouraged! I have always felt the reconnection and conversation that bubbles through our worship space before services begin to be a wonderful reflection of our love for and genuine interest in each other’s lives. So, again, the video was intended to helpfully quiet our voices, hearts and minds and shift our focus to the God of love that sits at the center of our time together on Sunday mornings. As an additional aside, we have taken a break from using the videos as a prelude to worship, as a consequence of moving to hybrid services, online and in person, as we came out of the pandemic. Our technology in this space makes showing the video online and in person, at the same time, a real challenge, though we hope in our new church, with up to date tech, we can return to using videos in worship more seamlessly.
Which is really all to say that we used to, and I hope to again, use as the opening video on this very Sunday, the first Sunday of Lent, each and every year, a video titled 40, which was created by an artist named Simon Smith. And, the video is, in my estimation, a powerful artistic exploration of what Jesus might have lived and moved through in his 40 days of wandering in the wilderness following his baptism by John in the River Jordan. I have one of Smith’s pictures on the screen, which I will return to…but before I reference it in particular…I am curious, if like me, you have every wondered why Jesus begins his ministry in this particular way. That is wonder why Jesus doesn’t simply begin his ministry of healing and teaching the way of love directly following his baptism. Surely the world needed it…asap…so why does the Spirit immediately drive Jesus away from people and into wilderness?
As I noted, several times in the Season of Epiphany leading up to Lent, Jesus receives at his baptism God’s own Spirit and powerful words of affirmation from his heavenly parent, which we heard in our Gospel lesson, once again, this morning. Words of love, blessing and support that I believe Jesus needed to hear and more so believe, as he began his life-transforming and often very challenging ministry. God says to his beloved child…you are mine…I love you entirely…I am so very pleased with you. Thus, it might seem reasonable that following his baptism, the reception of the Spirit, God’s words of affirmation, and the 30 years that proceeded it, for Jesus is thought to have been about 30 years old when he began his public ministry, that he already had everything he needed to step on to the stage and dive head long into love-spreading, life-giving work. So, again, why this interlude…these 40 days of being tempted by Satan with wild beasts and angels as his only companions?
And, as I have thought a lot about it, I have concluded that it is all about Jesus coming to know himself…about a very personal time of preparation for all that would follow in his three years of public ministry, including, at the end, the hardest part, giving his very life on the hard wood of the cross…defeating sin and death for all people, for all time…as I like to remind us…for you and even for me. You see, at Jesus’ baptism, he, indeed, receives his call. He is named by God, as God’s beloved son…but perhaps, just perhaps, understanding then what that actually means…finding the fortitude within himself to believe he is equal to that high calling…rooting himself deeply in God’s unending well of power and love and wisdom for all that would follow…well all of that hard and good intentional spiritual work seems to have required a bit more time, discernment, and prayer…40 days to be specific. And, I think that might be true for all of us as well, if we are discern that to which God is calling us and find the healing, power and wisdom we need to live into our own high calling. And, I will note, it might even take us a little longer, or sometimes a lot longer, than 40 days.
I recall a time a little over half way through my 21 years as an ordained person…when the Spirit, like Jesus following his baptism, drove me into the wilderness. It was a time when I was questioning my own call…yes…clergy also have wilderness like seasons in life. I was questioning my own ability to be the person and leader that quite frankly you, the goodly fellowship of St. Julian’s, deserves. And, as I wandered in the wilderness facing the wild beasts of self-doubt, feeling distant from God, questioning my strength, capabilities and character, like Jesus, along with the wild beasts, I encountered some angels along the way in my wilderness like time.
I will mention two in particular. The first is a friend named Jason. Jason is a very successful entrepreneur mainly in the tech world. And, at a particularly low moment, and I will admit that this feels incredibly vulnerable to share, I called him to ask what it might look like if I left ministry and came to work with him. I suggested that my skills as a communicator, team builder, vision caster, problem solver, relationship developer…all God-given gifts that many clergy develop and possess…might translate well to a leader at something like a tech start up. And, my friend agreed with me entirely. He said he would love for someone with my experiences, skills and heart to partner with him. But, he concluded, he didn’t really want to live in a world where I wasn’t a priest…and I wept. And, the second angel was one of our bishops now retired, who after pouring my heart out to her, all the questions and doubts, stopped me in my tracks and said, “Miles…we have so much confidence in you. We love you and believe in you.” And there were many other angels along the way that I encountered in my time in the wilderness…some of whom worship in this very place.
And, friends, those wild beasts I encountered along the way, well, I discovered that they were actually more of a gift than a mortal danger…as what I learned they really are is something like a mirror…something reflecting back to me the wild beasts that already live within us…that is the grief over loss and our own mistakes that live within us, the ambition and temptation for power that lives within us, the self-consciousness and doubt that lives within us…all of us. And, to make peace with such wild beasts requires us looking them in the face, naming them, and inviting God and those “angels” we trust to help us to tame them…that is to transform them from weaknesses into strengths. For, when we make peace with our imperfections, learn to talk to ourselves with the same love we extend to others, when we really believe that God’s grace is with us and is healing and empowering…we find that our wounds create in us empathy for others and are the very tools we lean on and use to help others heal. Thus, again, facing those wild beasts, rooting around in ourselves, turns out to be a gift.
Similarly, the image I chose from Simon Smith’s 40 that is on the screen is the artists imagining of Jesus facing, specifically, his temptations in the wilderness. And, you will notice the tempter is a mirror reflection of Jesus’ himself. And, my interpretation of the artist’s work is that all the temptations that we face…the temptation to choose ease over challenge…to choose self over other…to choose adulation over humility…to choose security over sacrifice…to choose power over service…all of these temptations are already rooting around in us. Thus, the choice of who we will be and how we will love…resides in the heart…every human heart. And, it is in the wilderness times of life that…with the help of our angels…with the help of God’s all-consuming love that is always present if willing to grasp it…that we discover the power to tame these temptations and learn who we really are…who we will be in and for the world when our own 40 days…or however many there might be…are up…when we, like Jesus, return from wilderness to the world…where, also like Jesus, we each and every one are so desperately needed. My own journey in the wilderness, with temptations, wild beasts and angels, led me to the blessed conclusion that God’s singular call on my life is to be a priest…and though never perfectly…for there is no such thing on this side of glory…with God’s help and yours…I have everything necessary to live into that calling.
And the great gift over time, sometimes much time, is that we come to see that it was, indeed, God’s own Spirit that drives us into the wilderness…not to suffer…but to become…to be shaped and formed into the very image of love that we were created by God to be. For the wilderness, even if we entered it feeling confused and alone, is where we find God and do the good spiritual work with God to learn who we really are meant to be…how very capable and competent and beautiful we really are. It is where we get to face the wild beasts and be ministered to by the angels. It is in the wilderness where we, like Jesus, come to really know ourselves and very personally prepare for all that follows…a life full of meaning and purpose, good work and transformative ministry, in and for the world…for all those entrusted to our care.
And, I am convinced that the process of becoming who God has called us to be is a life-times worth of work. Thus, we don’t only enter the wilderness once. In addition to Jesus entering the wilderness following his baptism, the gospels are dappled with moments when Jesus escapes to a deserted place to seek a deep connection with God. So, my invitation today is to pay attention to God’s Spirit alive and active in you, that you might blessedly follow as and when the Spirit drives you into the wilderness for the first time or the hundredth. As, indeed, the angles in scripture so often say…do not be afraid…do not be afraid of what the wilderness will offer you. It is good…it is Godly.
Friends, at your own baptism, you were each called by God to be a minister of the Gospel of Jesus Christ, of the Good News of God’s unending love for all people and for the whole world. And, in the wilderness, you will rediscover this fact…this call, and you will grow in it from glory into glory…be remade…be recreated…more and more…into the love-spreader and life-giver you were chosen to be…Jesus’ own heart and hands laboring in the world…for the very life of the world. Amen.